Michael Cheney BlogDouchetagnan and the Three Muskerdouches – Michael Cheney Blog https://michaelcheney.com/blog Marketing. Uncovered. with Michael Cheney Sun, 12 May 2019 12:58:03 +0000 en-US hourly 1 Douchetagnan and the Three Muskerdouches https://michaelcheney.com/blog/2015/04/03/douchetagnan-and-the-three-muskerdouches/ https://michaelcheney.com/blog/2015/04/03/douchetagnan-and-the-three-muskerdouches/#respond Fri, 03 Apr 2015 17:13:40 +0000 Michael Cheney http://michaelcheney.com/blog/?p=940 people-23733_640There are 4 main breeds of douche you need to watch out for in internet marketing;

#1. The Lazy-Ass Douche

The mere thought of “work” sends shivers down their spine.

Always on the hunt for magic push buttons you should avoid them like the plague.

#2. The Holier-than-Thou Douche

Despite living off a friend’s couch, eating Ramen noodles for breakfast and being upto their eyebrows in debt these jokers feel they know it all and are all too happy to dole out advice to any muppet willing to listen. Shoot on sight.

#3. The Lily-Livered Douche

Tell them the cold, hard truth (or use the wrong “unprofessional” language) and these pussyfooting pansies will scream blue murder.

They demand massive mollycoddling and attention and should be tossed overboard at first whiff.

#4. The Pedigree Douche

Just 100% pure douche.

These guys refund so they can get your stuff for free, they do chargebacks rather than contact your support and send you abusive emails because your product didn’t make them rich in 7 seconds.

Check the bottom of your shoes regularly for the tell-tale smell and wipe these guys off immediately.

Here comes the money lesson:-

The best way to avoid douches altogether (and make a bucketload of moolah in the process) is get your own sales funnel.

You know – a series of different offers starting with free optin, then paid, monthly etc.

This will weed out the douches while simultaneously building your business with quality customers and lining your pockets with lots of luvverly lucre.

Get your done-for-you, ready to earn sales funnel here;

http://www.michaelcheney.com/done-for-you-funnel/ (Anti-Douche Warning: This will take you 42 mins to set up. Yikes.)

BTW:-

You also get this cool bonus from me for free after you buy Instant Product Funnel;

I recently pulled $127k out of JVZoo in the space of 3 weeks with a very special type of salesfunnel.

Your free bonus is a video training that shows you exactly what I did 😉 (It’s delivered to you instantly in your JVZoo account after you buy.

 

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